Philip J. Fry · After mayoral elections were held last weekend within Houghton High School, the general consensus was that Richard Nixon, president of the world, would earn a sweeping victory. However ...

Lett R. Boxed · In a breaking story recently uncovered by hardworking Lewd reporters, Provost Andrew Storer was discovered to ...

Six Babies In a Trench Coat · In a turn of events described as “cataclysmically embarrassing” by the MTU Provost’s office, ...

Pat’s Margarita Bucket · The first matter of business was raising tuition by 21% to pay off their 6,383,652 $3 Klarna loans.